Lennonism [John J. Miller]

K Lo: I’m with you on “Imagine” — love the piano, hate the lyrics. A band called A Perfect Circle has a great cover version. The music is bleak and the vocals are subdued. It’s a much-needed deconstruction of the song. It’s like the anti-”Imagine.” I’m not sure the musicians intended it that way, but that’s the result, by my lights. Definitely worth a 99-cent download.

A few things:

1. The Perfect Circle cover is fairly horrible as a piece of music, actually. It’s like awesomeness on valium, sifted through gauze, and then drained of life force. Which is not to say the original Imagine is awesome, but the cover was filtered through that mysterious substance known as AwesomeX
2. I’m sure that Miller, should he choose to investigate, would love the much-needed deconstruction of Maynard James Keenan (whom I personally think is fantabulous; he’s the singer. Also, a vet!). See also: Dirty Harry by Gorillaz, Born in the USA by Springsteen, And the Band Played Waltzing Matilda by The Pogues, et. al. Don’t forget Gandhi!
3. Imagine by Perfect Circle was recorded in 2003 and released in 2004. Hmm… that time seems so familiar. Anyone remember what was happening around that time? Anyone. Drawing a blank here.
4. One might, uh, imagine that in this here world of the internetwebby thing, the video might be on the YT, and might, you know, display the intent of the artists:

As parody, it’s half-assed. As candidate promotion it is among the strongest reasons possible as to why you should not, under any circumstances, vote for McCain.

I don’t know who created this, but my money’s on Al Qaeda.

Enjoy.

I wish I knew how to quit you, Brady.

I’m a tight end
but I hope one day
to be your wide receiver
how I long for you to hit meeeee
in the slot

Genius!

If you listen to the original, you’ll notice something… autotune is Katie Price/Jordan’s best friend. BEST friend. (actually, check that, they’ve removed the mp3. Tragedy!)

Well at least my ears aren’t bleeding any more. My eyes on the other hand… (that shower scene is HIGHlarious!)

First two guesses don’t count.1.

Am I the only one who vomited in my mouth a little here?

1. Michael Jackson. Entering the auditorium for the 2006 World Music Awards.
Seriously.
That’s Jacko.

Guess doing all those magazine covers didn’t boost her votes enough. Looks like some personal assistant is going to get fired.

Sure, sure, she says it was a joke and of course I believe it was… but it’s way funnier this way. Besides anyone who sings the shit AI-er Underwood puts out does not deserve to receive any award other than a Razzie:

She was driving last Friday on her way to Cincinnati
On a snow white Christmas Eve
Going home to see her Mama and her Daddy with the baby in the backseat
Fifty miles to go and she was running low on faith and gasoline
It been a long hard year
She had a lot on her mind and she didn’t pay attention
She was going way to fast
Before she knew it she was spinning on a thin black sheet of glass
She saw both their lives flash before her eyes
She didn’t even have time to cry
She was sooo scared
She threw her hands up in the air

Jesus take the wheel
Take it from my hands
Cause I can’t do this all my own
I’m letting go
So give me one more chance
To save me from this road I’m on
Jesus take the wheel

Believe it or not, the song’s actually worse with the melody. Don’t believe me?

Don’t say I didn’t warned you. She does get credit for recording her video in a pawn shop, though. Nothing like $0.10 vases and glassware to set the stage for jebus’ taking your wheel and rubbing you in a circular motion, with some slow loving hot hands creeping up your thighs. Hot!

By the way, how do conservative christianists reconcile their supposed “personal responibility” principles with their welfare state reliance upon jebus/god’s provisions?

The reaction from the jingoist nutballs was so incendiary, so ridiculous, so disproportionate to the innocuous comment by Maines, that it deserves a nice, long, objective look on the hows and the whys. I hope this documentary does that.

Note: NBC and CW Television (= UPN & WB) are refusing to air ads for the documentary. This after CNN and NPR refused to carry ads for Death of a President (the fake documentary about the assassination of W). Censorship, anyone? (and I’m being serious here, not in the fake “censorship”! way people who don’t understand censorship cry). Oh, and if you really want to get mad at the censorship in our country, observe how nearly every instance of refusal to carry ads by major media networks is for the benefit of the Bushevik administration.

A recording of the Australian singer and his ultra-tanned bimbo wife singing the song “A Whole New World” has been doing the industry email rounds in recent days.

Apparently set to end up on a Christmas covers album in the UK, the tabloid couple ramble tragically through the song they danced to at their wedding last year.

Or just go to the mp3 and skip the flash-based player.

Make. The. Bad. People. Stop. I only wish this were a parody. Maybe it is. Please tell me it is. No one is this clueless as to their musical prowess, right?

I’m sharing this with the same spirit of someone who takes a 3 year old milk container out of the fridge, sniffs, blanches, and says “goddamn! this is horrible! here. smell this!”

Enjoy.

iKaraoke sends the music from your iPod to your stereo minus the lead vocals, so you can step up to the mic and sing the lead in your favorite tunes.

iKaraoke makes it easy to pause the music, scan forward or backward, or temporarily add the vocals back in to help you find your place. It even includes reverb effects to enhance your performance.

iKaraoke hooks up to your stereo via line-in cable, or wirelessly through your FM receiver.

That I don’t actually own an iPod shall not deter me. I need something to replace the small, boring selection available in my Karaoke Revolution discs for my PS2. They’ve been fun, but there’s only so many times you can slaughter New York, New York and Under Pressure before you’re longing for 4Gb of portable mp3 player goodness.

Now make it work with the iAudio X5, dammit!

This is definitely the best thing I’ve seen all week.

The aspiring rapper’s debut CD “Playing With Fire” hits shelves on Halloween, but his much-derided ode to ladies’ derrieres, “PopoZao,” reportedly won’t make the cut. It’s being replaced, reports WENN, by a duet with Britney Spears called “Crazy.”

I’m devastated. Devastated, I say!

Correct me if I’m wrong, but hasn’t BritBrit already done a song called “Crazy“?

In case you haven’t seen the supremo exercise in douchebaggery that is KFed + Popozao… enjoy:

If sperm motility was considered a talent, KFed would be a superstar.

Did I miss something in the groundrules forbidding Vanilla Ice? Answer: in war, there are no ground rules. Just ask the Bush administration! Booyah!

Apparently no one on YouTube has gotten around to Was Not Was’ Walk the Dinosaur. Chop, chop, minions!

Update: OK, I was wrong. It’s there. I love you, YouTube!

If you spend any significant amount of time browsing around YouTube, you’ll notice a surprising number of videos consisting of people busting a move to popular music. It can be anything from a presumably inebriated couple with a camera orientation problem dancing to Prince’s “Kiss” to a solitary college student grooving in his dorm room. Whatever the context, it’s all but certain that the dancers haven’t paid the RIAA for the rights to the song.

That has led to a recent spate of cease-and-desist notices from the music trade group directed at some users of YouTube. Despite the fact that the recordings are generally of poor quality—especially where the audio is concerned—the RIAA is moving to rid the Internet of the scourge of amateur Solid Gold dancers.

Good to see that David Brent made the list