And you thought the media was shameful in 2000… and Iowa thoughts
Imagine these sophomoric little heathers in a Clinton-St. John McCain general election:
In a noble attempt to warm up reporters on caucus eve, Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton made a surprise jaunt onto the press bus on Wednesday morning, bearing coffee and bagels. “It’s been a long campaign,” she said, standing at the front of the bus. “I don’t know about you, but for me, it’s been a great experience.” Dumbfounded by the appearance (her first and only on board the bus since she started campaigning almost exactly a year earlier), the traveling press corps watched in silence as she handed off the goods to Phil Singer, her spokesman, making a rare appearance on the press bus himself. Clinton then turned and left.
Just to restate: a/the leading candidate for the Democratic nomination steps onto the press bus, bringing gifts and yummies and the press, the defenders of our freedom and bringers of light into the darkness of untruthiness … sat mute. Not a single question. Just the cold shoulder.
Now, imagine if the bagels n’ coffee were brought by McCain. Or Bush ’00. Do you think the collected media would have shrugged, took the vittles, and given the cold shoulder? Me neither.
Looking at the current results, Obama wins (unfortunately, that pandering choda scrubber; remember it’s his back yard and got both traitor Kucinich and Mrs. Grumpy fav Richardson to back him as their delegates second choice), Edwards looks strong (he was outspent by more than 5:1 by Obama and Hillary – look at the pretty graphs!), finishes in second, Hillary looks like toast. She’s dead in the water, it’s just a matter of time now. Media + unfavorables == dead in the water. I don’t see Obama getting derailed, but my fingers are crossed.
Huckabee creams the pathetic GOP crop and sends party aparatchiks into conniption fits, Romney’s toast and McCain looks unelectable (he’s in 4th behind the animated corpse known as Thompson, though they’re going to argue that he didn’t “try” for the state. Then again, neither did Thompson). I think watching the GOP and faux news go into apoplexy is the highlight of my week.
In other news: fuck Iowa and New Hampshire. That these two, tiny, unrepresentative states hold such large sway over our presidency is absolutely ridiculous. Rural, white, and provincial… yeah, exactly the dominant characteristics I want determining my country’s leader.
The media’s coverage is absurd as well. Hillary’s 30% is a repudiation, but McCain’s 88% rejection percentage is a huge victory!!!1!!! (Chris Matthews). Iowa’s super important… unless it isn’t… which it isn’t when we’re talking to Giuliani, but is when we’re leading into a commercial break. Fuck you, corporate media. Now bring me some male enhancement ads.
