Battlestar

I’m finally getting around to watching the Battlestar Gallactica series, which many of my friends think is the bomb.

I really wish I could see what they see, because while it’s got some good moments, it’s far more miss than hit. The style is engaging on the surface, but the writing … dear, god, the writing! … is so hamhanded in certain episodes, I feel like they wrote the damn script in crayon.

Some of the characters are engaging, and the acting by Edward Olmos, Mary McDonnel, and sometimes Katee “Starbuck” Sackhoff (she’s no Amanda Tapping, though), James “Gaius” Callis, and Aaron “the Chief” Douglas is quite good. Tricia Helfer gets the best lines and she delivers them pretty well. Except for the overwrought faith v. reason bits. Really, enough with that god shit, please. I get that the Cylons are the religious fanatic terrorist allegory already. Also, I’m watching the first episode where she has to do more than be Gaias’ conscience and… she’s not doing so hot.

The rest of the acting is pretty abysmal, though. Grace Park? Astoundingly bad. I’ve seen high school acting better than her painful blocking and non-emoting (she’s great in minor lesbian french kissing scenes, though). Seriously, who cast her? She’s hot of course, but how she made it through auditions, I’ll never know. Maybe she works for scale.

As bad as the acting is, it pales in comparison to some of the dogshit episdoes. For example, “Litmus”, while I agree with the message they are attempting to convey, was as amateurish an effort as I’ve seen since that piece of shit Eragon. Other episodes are just as shoddy and as Litmus and their quality is getting worse. The dialogue is crap, the plot is filled with situations that are created for the writers’ convenience rather than emerging organically (not to mention the deus ex machina), and the illogical ridiculousness of the twists overwhelm what should be hip and cool.

Also, the Cylon CGI is cheap and cheesy. Why are they bipedal, anyway? And why the weird mix of actual physics with cliche’d WW2 dogfight moves? And enough with the shaky handcam already, please. Ye gods.

Whatever. What I’ve learned is that a moderately well executed series with some average-at-best looking guys and superhot women in positions of power will sell loads and loads of advertising.